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Bored'em

O, boredem please go away!

I hate the funky feeling you give me in my chest, the feeling of emptiness and loneliness!

O how I hate you boredem!

I wish I was on a vacation far far away from you, somewere like Ireland or even a nice weekend trip to the next big city for some fun in the sun at a waterpark,

O boredem, how I wish I was far far away from you.

Its to hot to go outside, its to gloomy to stay inside!

The thought of no fireworks on the 4th of July makes you swell in my chest and I really really dont like it.

Knowing that everyone else is/is going to have a great time makes me hate you even more.

BOREDEM why wont you just go the heck away already.

You make a minute feel like dayz and dayz..

I dont think I can stand much more of you boredem.

You stir up my wonderlust and make me want to travel to distant lands to see great sights, laugh all day and talk about all the great things I seen for wks after I get back.

Yes Boredem you make me have mini whine sessions, and annoy my hubby who just doesnt understand my hate of boredem, because he is happiest when he can sit in the house and do nothing but sleep all day!

So boredem, Since you instist on invading my chest with your funky feelings of boredem and loneliness I shall make you listen to my rants and raves til you decide to leave me alone!!!

I rarely see you boredem and Im ready to have you gone gone to the wind!

I can normally send you way by sticking my head deep into a sewing project or cleaning, but you just make everything seem so much more boring.....

OK, Im done with my rant now... I think.... So Im off to find an intrigueing sewing project that will keep me busy til the wee hours of the morning, Maybe then I will be to tired for boredem to sneak his ugly little head into my chest. Im sure many of you feel this way from time to time, especially my stay at home moms. Since we spend such a large about of time in the home doing the same things over and over again.

I will be glad when my mom gets back from vacation, She gives me something to do and someone to talk to besides my 4yr old diva and my hibernating hubby.

Thanks for listening to my pity party!

CHUNKY BLING

I recently contacted my Chunky Bling, because they wanted to buy ad space from me on my blog.

Well, before I agreed I went and checked out there site, and all the cute jewelry, I loved it so I decided to give it a go.

Then after a little more investigating I realized I could throw a Chunky Bling Party!!!

So I did and Im inviting all my awesome readers, yea thats YOU!

Here is the link:

http://chunkybling.com/FREEbies/jewelry-parties/leslie99

And as a Thank you for coming to my party, They are letting me offer you  a 15% off discount on your purchase!!!!

All you have to do is use coupon code:

LESLIE99

durning check out!

HERE IS A PREVIEW OF WHAT THEY HAVE TO OFFER:

Come check it out, Please!!!

Changes!

Wow,

I feel like my life is taking on tons of changes this past year.

I got engaged after 5yrs of waiting...lol and Im  planning the wedding for next april.

YAY ME!!

Next,

 Destiny started making friends with neighborhood kids, thats something I struggle with; I grew up outside of town, the closest house was a mile away and I have serious issues with people being in my space/house....Im working on it though.

And my next big issue is the thought of adding a second child to our household.

I just cant seem to make a decision between having another child and my selfishness in wanting to get some of my personal life back, ie work,school, etc......

Destiny is just getting old enought to start school which will give me some free time to get a job or go back to school, and the thought of throwing myself back into another 3-4yrs of being a stay at home mom is unexplainable. Not to mention that I dont want it to interfere with my wedding, I have waited so long to have one and I dont what a big baby bump under my wedding dress, and I sure dont want to pospone it.

And last and I guess most bothersome is the fact that I dont have a baby girl anymore... I have a big girl! She is constantly doing things that remind me of that fact and its hard to accept that time flys! She turns 4 in a couple of days, and will be starting preK in august.....She will change so much once she starts school, and I hope Im as prepared as I can be for all those changes.  I wish I could just hit the rewind button and do it all over again, she was just the best and easiest baby ever.

I mean how could you resist this little face!!!

I THINK i want a baby....

I just dont know what I want right now.

Some days I think yes, yes I do want a baby, then other days im like no, im in no rush for another baby.

I done my pros and cons, I still cant decide.

On one hand Im perfectly content with my beautiful little girl, She is just now getting to the age she can do things for herself, she is big enough to go to the carnivals and ride the rides, go on fun vacations, dress herself, etc. Which means Im finally able to focus on myself a little more and  go back to work,go back to school,when she starts school in August.

Not to mention I dont want to start back to school or work and have to stop right in the middle again to have another child, Im not ready to have to change diapers, carry a diaper bag, make bottles, be up half the night, miss out on Las Vegas vacations,and it would make taking Destiny camping much more difficult. Im also a tad afraid that she wont beable to get the love and attention she gets now. I know its gonna sound stupid but Im also a tad afriad I wont beable to love the next one as much as I love her, she is my whole heart and I just cant imagine having any love left to give to another child.

But on the on the other hand, Destiny is already asking for a baby now that she has a little cousin and her other cousin just had a baby brother.... I also think she gets lonely, I mean I can only play barbies and babies for so long and so much. I hate to watch her at the park playing alone, I hate watching her in the front yard just wandering around because she has no one to play with, It breaks my heart. I know I want her to  have a sibling, because heaven forbid something should happen to me and johnny I want her to have a brother/sister to lean on and understand what she is going through. I know Johnny, Destiny and Myself are just getting older and if there was a right time in our lives its now.

Truth be told I just want to leave it up to god, but thats hard to do when I have the mirena which prevents pregnaucy  for 5yrs, but I feel like going to the doc and having it removed is making the desicion to have another one....kinda defeats the purpose of letting god decide, huh?

Realisticly I probably should have had my second child a long time ago, but we just werent ready for that and Im still not sure we are now and Im also a tad afraid I will have a boy- I just dont feel like a boy mom.

Listening to boy moms talk about things boys do,go through, etc just doesnt sound exciting at all!!!

I dont want to to have to deal with circumsision, I dont what to deal with holding it all the time as he gets older, I dont want to deal with mud and bugs, I dont want to deal with ruff and tumbly fights...etc.

Im not saying that I wont love it just because its a boy or anything like that, because I would love him... It just doesnt sound very exciting thats all.

I believe Johnny is just as flip floppy on the situation to.... He just wants me to make the decison and not bother him with the if ands or buts.... He would be happy either way. Men can be so unhelpful!! All he cares is that if  we do have an other one he wants a boy.

And I would have to put off school/work for another 3-4yrs and I dont know that Im prepared to do that right now.

My mother on the other hand wants me to hurry up and have another baby and she doesnt care what it is....lol

Argh... I just dont know.......